you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
