Me. At least after what I've been through.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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