does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
