Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
