I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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