threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
