Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize
