we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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