nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
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