stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
