Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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