Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
