i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
