Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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