apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
