She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
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