I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
