the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
