What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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