Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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