He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Its about making memories worth repressing
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
