so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
