Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
