thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize