With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Randomize
