problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
