if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
