So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
