hell yes lets make some ravioli
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
All the doctor said was why
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
