People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize