hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
