how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
May the power of my ass compel you!!
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
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