Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
