yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
