Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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