White coat. Heels.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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