You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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