the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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