I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
