What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
