I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize