She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize