You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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