my mouth tastes like poor choices
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
