i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
