Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
