There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
