So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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