Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
