he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
