K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
You did what with his pubic hair?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
